What’s the best way to break up a relationship? Am sure you must have been confronted with this situation before, where you want to break up a relationship (at times, friendship) and your innermost thoughts are on how to go about it.
Such a thing is always not a good situation and don’t deceive yourself, it is not easy. Of course, how can anyone expect a break up to be a good situation at all? Breaking up is a selfish act that can be a necessary evil in your dating life. If you don’t breakup quickly and honestly, it’s unfair to you and the other person. If you thinking about breaking up with someone, it is probably time to do it.
Would you want to be with someone who was having second thoughts while you were madly in love with them? It is going to be an ugly situation and there is nothing you can (or anyone) can do about it. There is no best way to doing it, but there are easier ways to do the whole process. There are a number of tactics that can help make it easier for both parties (even though both parties may not recognize it at the time).
Here are some good tactics to use for a “clean” breakup:
1. Adjust your mentality and recognize the situation: You are not ruining someone’s life ; they will get over you some day. Remember, it is unfair if you are feeling it and you do not do it.
2. Make it quick: The longer you take to get to the point, the less they will take you seriously. And if you make it look like you are having a hard time going through with the breakup, they will think they change your feelings or stick around in your life.
3. Be sincere: Lay it straight on your date. If you are seeing someone else, tell them you are seeing someone else. Avoid words like “I love you, I’m not just in love with you.” People don’t understand this stuff. If you’ve lost feelings for them, just say it. They can’t argue with that. Avoid covering up. Honesty will protect you in the long run, because the truth comes out eventually.
4. Don’t feel sorry for anyone: People will beg, cry, get angry, intimidate, threaten or shower you with guilt. It is just going to slow you down and prevent you from getting to your objective. And never take someone back, or cancel breaking up because you feel sorry for them. Do you really want to stay with someone you feel sorry for?
5. Set Post-Breakup Rules: Let them know the deal: you won’t be answering their calls or emails. You won’t be accommodating them if they show up at your apartment. Eventually, if they have any personality and independence, they will stop bothering you- but only if you stick to these rules. If you lay these rules out at the time of breakup, then they can’t say: “why are you ignoring my calls?” Don’t tell them what they are allowed to do – they can call you all they want, but if you have stated you won’t be answering their calls, then you are well within your rights when you don’t pick up
6. Use a neutral site: Never do it at your place. You want to be able to leave on your own time. Neutral places are the easiest locations to make a quick getaway. The longer you’ve been together, the more likely it is that you’ll be required to do it in person.
7. Stick With It: The more you take them back, the less seriously they’ll take your breakup attempts.
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