Five Stages Leading To Relationship Breakup Part 2

Exposure – both partners mutually become aware of the problems in the relationship. In Relationships, having problems with your partner equates to frustration, bitterness, regret and sadness. Are the problems that you are experiencing with your partner making your life difficult and depressing. I know this might be hard to believe but in relationships “winding off” the communication is so poor that spouses never talk about their problems. They become accustomed to holding everything inside, and only talk about their problems to others but not to each other.

Negotiation – both partners attempt to negotiate a solution to problems.  Negotiation is a dialogue between the two parties, intended to reach an understanding, resolve points of differences in their relationship, or gain advantage in outcome of dialogue, to produce an agreement upon courses of action to take from thereon. Negotiation is intended to aim at compromise. So, the two partners just decide to talk after holding things inside them. This is in a manner of “so what happens now”, with each trying to gain an advantage for themselves by the end of the process.

Resolution and transformation – both partners apply the yield of their negotiation. By this stage, excuses , pleas, promises and forgiveness have been given and accepted. Both partners agreement to work on their relationship is put into action. Partners  try to mend their actions that is destroying their relationship with a view to improving the relationship and hences stay together. They may perhaps have a plan to getting back on track, this plan is put into work and each partner honestly make efforts at staying together.

Termination – proposed resolution fails to rectify issues and no further solutions are accepted or applied. By this stage, the handwriting is seen on the wall, things did not workout as planned. Promises has been broken over and over again. Behaviours that destroy relationships are repeated over time such that there is anger, worry, dissappointment, guilt and regrets.At this stage, the mind is made up and there is no going back. One or both partners walk away.

Whatever relationship you are in presently, you need to examine the relationship vis-a-vis things happening in it. You may have gone through four of these stages over and over again without knowing. Now that you know, maybe it is time to call it quit if you are not getting what you want or hoped for. It is better than a heartbreak you know!